Posts Tagged ‘addiction’
Too Much of a Good Thing?
Posted on: October 25, 2015
Too much of a good thing for me has included: chocolate, art supplies, buying wool and knitting scarves, and exercise programs. I thought that meant I was OCD, but it does not fit the criteria. I do not wash my hands a lot, just sometimes after a lot of chocolate.
I have eaten enough chocolate bars in my lifetime to build a fort, knit enough scarves to warm over 40 necks, filled an old trunk with enough art supplies to last 5 years and spent the last few months taking chair yoga, NIA and riding an exercise bike as if my life depended on it.
My life does depend on it so I have been burning down the fort, found a place to sell my scarves for cheap, gave a bag of wool to Jack’s class for a project, began reading ‘Big Magic’ by Elizabeth Gilbert (Eat, Pray, Love), to get over the fear of creating, and continued going to yoga, NIA and riding my exercise bike except when having a fibromyalgia flare up.
I have also been researching chronic illnesses and their connection to how and what we eat. Documentaries that have become my friends include: “Fat, Sick and Almost Dead”, “Food Inc.”, “Vegucated”, “Hungry for Change”, “Forks Over Knives”, and “Food Matters”.
Watching how food is altered, processed and poisoned and how animals are raised and slaughtered has not turned me into a vegetarian, although it should have, but it has made me change my ways.
I am astounded by the epidemics of obesity, diabetes, high blood pressure, many cancers and heart diseases that can be directly connected to what we eat. The proof is out there through studies of eating habits around the world.
Because my first year of retirement was dedicated to recovering from work exhaustion, getting up when my eyes opened, reading every book I could get my hands on physically and digitally, and spending more time with family and friends, it went by quickly. My second year began with goal setting, facing my sorry, sick self and pulling up my big girl panties.
Actually, a diagnosis of another chronic disease in July was the jolt I needed. My one big goal now is to dance at my grandchildren’s weddings. To that end, I have met with a nurse every few weeks at the medical clinic to discuss nutrition, found and watched all those documentaries, joined exercise programs at the seniors’ centre and stopped eating mindlessly to fix what ails me. The eating and non-exercise were causing what ails me.
After a few months of this total self-care, I have had my blood pressure medication cut in half, lowered my blood sugar so that I am no longer considered to be pre-diabetic, lost nearly 30 pounds and 4.75 inches off my waist. I still have a long way to go but I am on the road.
I am putting this out there to be accountable. That is scary but necessary. It has not been an easy process. I have stumbled and emotionally beat myself up, but have kept my eyes on the dancing ahead.
Joe Cross has taught me about juicing and micro nutrients, and learning about nutrition has taught me to stay away from bread and processed foods as much as possible. I gave up caffeine.
I am not on a diet. I do not deprive myself. My tastebuds have changed because of juicing dark green vegetables and fruit and from having a local vegetable share this summer with Noble Gardens. I just signed up for a winter share because they grow without chemical pesticides and I am supporting a family business.
I also gave away my Keurig so I would have more room on the counter for my juicing machine and cutting board. My energy level has quadrupled. I have gone from a walking zombie with chronic fatigue and multiple aches and pains to looking for things to do like clean out closets and wash windows.
There. It is out there. I am accountable to you now. That should make me lose a pound or two, just by sweating at the thought!
Facing an addiction . . .
Posted on: September 18, 2011
If I have more than one alcoholic drink, I am asleep in the corner. Many years ago, I was married to an alcoholic who could party all night, won the at-party award for funniest stand-up comedian when drinking and who asked what was wrong with me because I did not have the same stamina. He was funny, but he was drunk and often.
I do have an addictive personality however, and it has come to the surface in many forms other than alcohol. The latest is Facebook. This world of connecting with people you’d lost track of and then following their posts of what they ate for breakfast and who they are ticked off at today had become my world.
It started innocently enough. I signed up, found people from my past and delighted in catching up with their lives. Then I was spending long evenings just hanging on-line, commenting here and there and even checking for updates as soon as I got up in the morning. After each day in the work world, I would unlock that front door at home and head straight for the computer. Between cooking, cleaning, watching a tv show, I would gravitate back to the computer, checking my email, then FB.
It all seemed innocent enough because it was a gradual slide into this obsession. One day I realized how ridiculous it was. Ninety of those ninety-eight people are not part of my real life. I am not going to make the effort to visit them, nor will they likely ever visit me. I really don’t give a rat’s tail that “R” had a busy day and wishes it was the weekend, or that another “R” is sitting in a cafe having a ‘Mucho Grando Poopo, extra-large’, or that “M”‘s daughter is beyond awesome in the school operetta.
So, what have I been doing on there? Standing on my own soapbox, in front of a sea of faceless computer screens, I have been sharing MY anecdotes about life and family. Do those ninety-eight people care that my grandkids are beyond cute and smart or that I have a new drama of the week in my life? A few people, my A list, take time to comment, as I do on their updates.
But Facebook should be like that one drink, occasional and just a brief encounter. As an addiction for me, it had gone too far.
Since the beginning of my FB journey, I have suffered the massive sharing of materialistic opulence at Christmas, the constant wishing it was Friday, the complaints against lazy husbands, bad hockey and more snow. I witnessed a one-day event that continued on FB for well over a year and an emotionally charged group who began in-fighting over a local news event.
I saw people at their worst and people at their best. I presented myself at my worst and maybe at my best (debatable), but I am finally finished. I have de-activated my account.
The first few days were difficult. I wanted to constantly ‘check’ what was happening on FB. I held back, saying I would stay off for a week, and what a week it was! I got so many other things accomplished! I read an awesome book, did household purging and thought about other things besides FB and its ‘peeps’.
I finally did check in on day 7. I had missed a few hundred posts. My mouse scurried through them. Same old, same old. I was let down and elated at the same time. Then I deactivated my account again and will attempt a 2 week hiatus this time. My goal – to either close my page for good or only drop in once a month.
In all fairness, I do miss the ‘friends’ who wrote with wit and gave me a daily laugh. I miss “P” and “S” whose anecdotal stories about their children were delightful, and “L” who is a born writer and expecting her first child with so much joy and gratitude after a long struggle to get pregnant. I miss “S” who tells stories of his escapades teaching in Asia.
In two weeks, I will go back to FB and find out what these few are up to, but I will not go back full-time. I have things to do and important decisions to make about my own life, and I want my free time to be exactly that, free, not attached to my FB page.
BTW – I found a FB addiction site on-line. People were expressing similar sentiments as mine, but I decided not to join. Everyone there had transferred their addiction from FB to this new site.
IntrepidWoman's Journey 